Here’s a brutal truth:
Your life isn’t determined by your circumstances. It’s determined by how you respond to them. And your responses? Your mindset dictates them.
Mindset isn’t just about positive thinking; it is how you perceive and respond to any event or circumstance in which life puts you. Your mindset shapes how you act in response to life’s challenges.
It is your brain’s operating system . It’s the difference between:
- Seeing failure as a death sentence vs. seeing it as a stepping stone.
- Avoiding challenges vs. seeking them.
- Giving up at the first obstacle vs. pushing through discomfort.
And here’s the best part: You can upgrade your mindset any time you want. However, the more negative or “damaged” your existing mindset is, the more effort it takes to improve it. If a person doesn’t take an effort to improve their mindset or feels it’s too hard, then that person will stay in mediocrity for the rest of their lives. And it happens.
This isn’t theoretical. It’s neuroscience. Your brain is like plastic, meaning it can remold itself based on how you use it.
So if you’re tired of self-sabotage, procrastination, and fear holding you back, this is your blueprint.
Let’s dive in.
The Two Mindsets That Control Your Life (And How to Shift Yours)
Psychologist Carol Dweck’s research revealed two core mindsets:
1. The Fixed Mindset (The Killer of Potential)
As the name suggests, the person with a fixed mindset has beliefs that they are not willing to change, despite the countless counter-arguments (proof of the opposite) presented to them. Once they learn something, they will keep it with them and will not let go. They:
- Believe talent and intelligence are static
- Avoid challenges and uncomfortable situations to protect themselves from getting impacted.
- Don’t try new things and always keep doing what they’re already good at.
- Take constructive feedback as a personal attack and mockery.
- Give up easily.
Result: Stagnation. Untapped potential. A life of “what ifs.”
2. The Growth Mindset (The Engine of Mastery)
In a growth-oriented mindset, a person is willing to change if needed. If they believe something to be true and you present them with opposite facts, they will change their belief and even thank you for it. They
- Believe abilities can be developed.
- Embrace challenges as opportunities to improve.
- See effort as the path to mastery.
- Learn from criticism.
- Persist through setbacks.
Result: Continuous improvement. Resilience. Success that compounds.
Let’s face it. No one wants to be in a fixed mindset. If you are in a fixed mindset but you’re happy, then there’s nothing wrong with you. If you’re not happy with your mindset, be proud, because that discomfort means your mind isn’t content with stagnation. It craves growth.
How to Rewire Your Brain for a Growth Mindset (Step-by-Step)
Step 1: Identify Your Fixed Mindset Triggers
A person can have both mindsets at the same time. For some things, you don’t want to change, but for others, you’re willing to change your beliefs.
We all have moments when our fixed mindset takes over. Common triggers:
- Failure -> “I’m just not cut out for this.”
- Criticism -> “They’re attacking me. Maybe I shouldn’t do it now.”
- Comparing yourself -> “They’re just naturally better.”
There’s nothing wrong with feeling like this occasionally, but if you constantly feel like that, now that’s a problem. Take an example of calling yourself a failure constantly, it not only drains your energy for that moment, but also programs your subconscious mind with a failure mindset. You’ll stop believing you’ll ever succeed and will always have doubts if you ever try to work on your goals.
What to do in this case?
Journal for a week: Whenever you feel an emotion that you don’t want to feel, note down your thoughts and then write a paragraph opposite to the feeling in a “when I” manner, not “if I”.
For example:
“I failed again today. I couldn’t wake up on time to go to the gym. I’m disappointed in myself. Why do I always do this after such careful planning the day earlier?”
Now write the opposite of what will happen if you succeed in the smallest action, such as this.
“when I succeed, I’ll be improving my health, and it will give me more energy to work on my goals and success faster and more effectively. I’ll feel much better and happier every day.”
Step 2: Reframe Challenges as Opportunities
Instead of:
- “This is too hard.” -> “This is how I grow.”
- “I’m not good at this.” -> “I’m not good at this yet.”
Action: Pick one skill you’ve avoided (public speaking, coding, fitness). Commit to practicing it for 30 days, no matter how rough the start.
The more you avoid discomfort, the more uncomfortable you’ll be. The more you chase discomfort, the happier you’ll be.
Step 3: Redefine Failure
In a fixed mindset, failure = “I am a failure.”
In a growth mindset, failure = “This didn’t work. What can I learn?”
Action: After any setback, ask:
- What went wrong?
- What can I improve?
- What’s my next step?
Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.Henry Ford
It is only a failure if you give up. As long as you’re trying again and again, you’ve not failed yet.
Step 4: Embrace the Power of “Yet”
If you feel you need to do something, but you’re not capable enough as of now. Don’t say “I can’t do this”, instead say “I can’t do this yet“. The word yet has a powerful effect on your brain. It tells you (or programs you) into believing that you’re going to do this sooner or later instead of just “not doing it”.
Step 5: Surround Yourself with Growth-Minded People
You might’ve heard this quote:
“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” Jim Rohn
It’s often used to highlight how your environment and close circle influence your mindset, habits, and success. You absorb the mindset of those around you. If your circle complains, avoids risk, and fears failure, you will too.
Action: Distance yourself from chronic pessimists. Seek out people who challenge you to grow.
The Action Mindset: How to Stop Overthinking and Start Doing
Knowledge is useless without action. You may have read dozens—even hundreds—of self-help books, but what have you done with the knowledge you gained?
If you read the book on Discipline and learn a lot about it, would you become a disciplined person? Of course not. For that to happen, you need to apply what you have learned in your life. It’s difficult at first, but the rewards are worth it.
Here’s how to shift from mere knowledge to action, from “I know” to “I do.”
1. The 5-Second Rule (Mel Robbins’ Secret to Beating Procrastination)
When you hesitate, your brain invents excuses. Don’t let it.
- Need to start a task? 5… 4… 3… 2… 1—GO.
- Afraid to speak up? 5… 4… 3… 2… 1—SPEAK.
Why it works: Counting interrupts overthinking and triggers action.
The more you delay a task, the possibility that you will not do it increases exponentially. Take an example of the morning alarm you set the day before. As soon as it rings, you have a few seconds to get the hell up. Every second that you stay in bed while alarm is ringing will increase the chances of you shutting it down and going back to sleep.
2. The “No Zero Days” Principle
Even if you do just one push-up, read one page, write one sentence – you’re moving forward. Don’t let that inner voice get to you, “I didn’t do much”. Yes, you did.
You did more than an average person does. How much you do doesn’t matter, what matters is whether you did or didn’t do.
3. Focus on Inputs, Not Outcomes
Results are the byproducts of your effort. The more you put in, the more likely you’ll get the results. While putting in your effort, your goal must be as clear as a glass. No ambiguity and no multiple paths.
For example, instead of saying “I will lose 10 pounds in a month”, say, “I’ll work out two hours a day instead of just one”. Why does it work?
Losing 10 pounds a month is ambiguous. You can do it in multiple ways, like putting on a diet, not eating much, avoiding junk food, and of course, going to the gym. If you set a goal like this, today you’ll go to the gym, tomorrow you won’t be in the mood, and you will think of just avoiding junk food. It won’t work that effectively.
But when your goal is clear: “I’ll work out two hours instead of one”, it doesn’t leave a space for ambiguity. You have to work out, not because you need to lose weight, but because it’s your goal. The “losing weight” will be a byproduct.
4. The “Do Something” Principle (Mark Manson)
Mark Manson’s “Do Something” principle is amazing. It says that:
Don’t wait for motivation to strike before taking action. Take the action first, and the motivation will come.
- Don’t wait to “feel like” working out. Just put on your shoes.
- Don’t wait to “feel inspired” to write. Just type one sentence.
Action: Next time you’re stuck, ask: “What’s the smallest thing I can do right now?”
The Resilience Mindset: How to Bounce Back Stronger
1. Adopt the “Anti-Fragile” Mentality (Nassim Taleb)
Being fragile means breaking under stress. When you’re doing a task and it gets overwhelming, you just shut it down completely. That is being fragile.
Anti-fragile means instead of breaking, you get stronger. You realise that you’re not strong enough yet to do this, so what do you do? You work harder to become stronger.
How to become anti-fragile:
- Seek small challenges daily (cold showers, difficult conversations). Notice the word used here is “challenge”. It needs to be something you’re uncomfortable with.
- Reframe stress as strength training for your mind.
2. The Obstacle is the Way (Stoic Mindset)
When you’re doing something and you’re stopped by some form of obstacle, don’t stop. This obstacle is the opportunity for you to become stronger. Don’t try to find an easy way over this obstacle. You need and you MUST face it.
Consider a video game. You can’t ignore all the enemies on the road and go directly to the boss to kill him. You won’t have enough experience or skill points to take him down. You need to kill the smaller enemies for experience points. Only then will you be able to face the bigger boss and claim the rewards.
Action: Next time you face a problem, ask: “How can this make me better?”
Challenge: Your 30-Day Mindset Reset
Habits are what decide a person’s future. Don’t confuse habits with routines. They’re different, although they overlap in a few things. Habits are activities that you do to get something in return. These may be good things or bad for you. Routines are a set of activities that you execute one after the other consistently.
Waking up in the morning, drinking water, taking a shower, having breakfast, and going to the office; this is a routine. It consists of multiple activities that are often followed in the same manner every time
Habit is something you do to get something or feel in any way. It doesn’t have a fixed time: journaling, listening to music, gardening, reading, etc.
A proper mix of both can benefit you in ways you cannot imagine, but you need to have proper routines in place, consisting of good habits. Start with small things. The smaller it is, the more likely you’ll do it.
The Bottom Line
Your mindset isn’t fixed. It’s a choice.
Choose growth over fear. Choose action over excuses. Choose resilience over victimhood.
Your life changes when your mindset does.
Because the right mindset doesn’t just change your thoughts. It changes your life.
Want More?
Now that you know how mindset plays a part in building a successful life, be sure to take a look at how your helps you build meaningful relationships.